Tag Archives: military

Military Brats to PCS

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It’s about that time for many military families to get their PCS (Permanent Change of Station) orders. For many youth here at USAFA Club Beyond, this will impact them. This means a new base, a new school, new friends, a new house, a new community, and in some cases a continent. Even if a family does not leave others around them do. So as I go to minister to many of these students and their families, I ask that you keep them in your prayers. To guide your prayers, here are some of the things that I will be bringing up with them:

To Students

  • Understand transition has a beginning and an end
  • If things did not go well the last time you moved remember your older and you are different now.
  • Figure out how you are going to say goodbye to your friends. Could you throw a party or would you rather just hang out with a select few friends?
  • Look up your new school and community. Highlight restaurants, fun places, and unique sites that you would d like to check out on a map.
  • Keep the memories. Compile them into a scrapbook or on Facebook. Be sure to collect everyone’s addresses in an address book.
  • Express your feelings! Do not be ashamed of them. Share what you’re feeling with your parents and friends.

 

To Parents

  • Be patient. On top of hormone and body changes or looking to after high school, they have another big change in their lives and they might not know how to fully process it.
  • Monitor yourself. It’s gonna be weirder if you are both crazy at the same time.
  • Always be on the lookout for warning signs, including depression, abnormal sleeping patterns, failing grades or poor socialization. Counseling could really help teens to adjust.
  • Urge teens to make new friends and become involved in activities. Helping them get started in social circles can help in the transition.

 

For those that work with military teens or have their own, here are some great resources: Military Youth on the Move, Military Assistance Program, PCS America, and Military Family Resources.

Youth Ministry for Military Brats

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Military culture is completely different than civilian life, yet across the board youth ministry is youth ministry. They still deal with dating issues, questions about God, and how to deal with parents in a Christian family. Yet there is a lot of things to be aware of with these teens and we as youth workers should properly mold our approach to serving them.

  • Deep Relationships Are Tough
    For a typical military family, their tours at a specific base will last three years before they pick up and move to another base (called PCS – Permanent Change of Station) that could be thousands of miles away. So they become really good at making friends, but it is hard to become intimate with them because even if one of them just moved here, the other person could be moving very soon. After the second or third base, the pain of having to lose friends becomes tough. Yet, as youth workers, we can be authentic with them, opening up and showing it is okay to be vulnerable.
  • Their Worldview Can Be Big
    With all of that moving, they probably have a huge appreciation for other cultures. When ninth graders read about World War II, most kids are annoyed that they have to read about something that is so far away and happened so long ago. Military brats that have lived in Europe or Japan have seen the culture and the words in the history books can come alive. At the same time, they realize that the world is bigger than just the school they go to or the town they currently are living in.
  • They Understand Death
    With one or both of their parents being “down range” (in an active combat environment), they constantly have in the back of their minds that they could be killed. In fact, for many civilians a CNN report on two dead in Iraq is something they just flip the channel to something ‘more entertaining.’ But for military families, the room goes quiet till they hear the names of the soldiers, quietly hoping and praying it is not their parents.

Christian Worldview with Military Brats : Application

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How Each Can Relate to the Other

As Modern and Post-modern Christians, we must be in fellowship with each other, regardless of differences that are not heretical.  As for Christians to the Post-Modern lost, Paul charges us to “become all things to all people.”  (1 Corinthians 9:22)  Thus, we must understand where they are coming from (understanding their story? J) and share Jesus with them that way.  If we can go beyond the simple definitions of why Modernists believe what they believe and why Post-Modernist need a different worldview, it becomes very easy to empathize with them and build meaningful and lasting relationships with them.

But with empathy, comes the necessary piece of being open to a better understanding of yourself and your faith.  We are not asking you to compromise your faith by any means, but much of the modern and postmodern worldviews are not core faith ideals.  If we understand their culture, understand how they look at the world, and can form our messages to them, form how we share the Gospel, and form our own thinking while we are with them to how they do it, we may quickly get to the heart of the relationships.  This can minimize frustration and many times shorten the path to a resolution.

One of the biggest aspects of ministering to teens is that we need to meet them where they are.  As volunteers and youth workers, many times this means that we need to shed some of the fears and issues we have in our own lives. This includes presuppositions of worldviews that are not foundational to our faith and ministry.  Can we look beyond our differences with students and love them as they are?

Worldviews with Military Brats

The military worldview tends to be a little different from the civilian world because of the experiences they have and family life they live with.  PCSing (Permanent Change of Station) for military brats is a way of life, parents in active-combat situations can be a constant part of life, and visiting many cultures and countries can broaden and mature a student’s worldview.

As soldiers are transferred every one to three years to a new base for a different tour, many times the military family follows.  This can create a very shallow worldview, one where you must maximize fun right away and not waste time on drama and uncomfortable situations.  Sure, they can make friends easily and frequently, but a lot of times their conversations only go surface level because if they go any deeper, it is too painful to know that one of you will probably have to move within the next year and a half.  As youth leaders, this means that we need to become vulnerable ourselves with them (while still holding to healthy boundaries) and let them know that you can be authentic with them and keep a safe environment.

As the family moves around, they get to experience many cultures, most likely visiting several continents within their youth and so seeing that the world is just bigger than the current community they live in.  This broadens their worldview with an understanding and probably even an appreciation and compassion for people with other worldviews.  This means that connecting with them probably will not be as difficult as with many civilian students.

With one or both of their parents potentially in active-combat situations, many times they have come to a more defined and mature worldview quicker than civilian students. This can be both a positive and negative thing for us as youth workers, knowing that they are probably ready to own their faith and really hold fast to it, but with the concern that emotions are sometimes hard to access in conversations or they may be overwhelming for them and it be hard to sift through so many of them at one time.

Christian Worldview with Military Brats : Positives and Negatives

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Criticism of Both Worldviews

Some issues of each worldview have been addressed already.  Modernity has brought about doubt with the mystery of God and the Christian faith, even as far as the existence of God and His power.  Because of this doubt, secularism has crept in and displaced Christianity from many people’s lives.

While modernity has clearly defined our faith in Christianity, it many aspects, it has pigeonholed the Christian faith.  What happens if God moves in radical ways and goes outside the lines of our theology?  What if the Holy Spirit empowers every Christian to begin to speak in tongue?  Would your faith be shaken too much?  I personally long for a God that I cannot clearly define and Moses would agree.  In Exodus 3, why Moses was speaking to God in the burning bush, he asks God for a name so that he could return to Israel and proclaim Him.  Would God say He is Lord of Israel?  If so, then He does not have power over every other nation.  Or maybe He is God of peace, but that means He is not Lord over power and protection.  Instead, He said, “I AM who I AM”, which left mystery and did not put Him into a box.

Post-modernity has issues of authority with their skepticism and lack of absolute truth, even an absolute truth in God.  But we also find issue with the fact that everyone has a unique story and what you believe does not necessarily apply to me.  While I believe that our past is extremely important (see below), I cannot agree that my life cannot impact you and some truths for me can be true for you.  In fact, my God is God of the whole world and does not need you to recognize Him to exist.  Friedrich Nietzsche is famous for his believe that God is dead because we do not need Him anymore, but God does not need for us to believe in Him for His sake, instead we must believe fully in Him for our sake.  So for us to stop believing, it would be better said, “we are dead.”

Positives of Both Worldviews

As mentioned, one of the best parts of the modernity worldview is that we have such a deep and rich theology of what we have as our core belief in faith.  I know that salvation without works is dead and works without faith is meaningless.  At the same time, science is something that can and does bring glory to God and can be a tool for His kingdom.  In bringing medical care to Africa and South America, we have saved many lives and as Jesus said, “whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” (Matthew 25:40)

Post-modernity has brought to light that Christians and the lost are more than just words on a page or a statistic to report to the church board.  We cannot simply get on our soapbox and condemn to hell those that walk past us for not knowing Christ.  Many times, we must tend to their mental, emotional, and physical needs before they are in a place to hear and accept the Holy Spirit.  In order for us to know what we can do, we must understand their story and empathize with them, just as we find Christ hurting with those who had hurt.   Secondly, there is so much truth in the issue of being skeptical.  As Christians, we need to be more environmentally conscience as well as understand that our marriage needs to be rooted in our faith.  Several of their concerns are valid and we should listen to what they have to say.

Christian Worldview with Military Brats : Post-Modernism Worldview

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1960’s – Present

Postmodernism is a movement away from the viewpoint of modernism.  For them, facts mean a lot less and experiences, memories, emotions, and stories are important.  This then means that we each have a story of our life with unique experiences and past.

“Postmodern philosophers have argued that there is no grand metanarrative (an overarching story or common experience that unites all human beings), and they have thereby attempted to deconstruct most philosophies and religions.”
(Jones, 2004. p 25)

Here are a few other parts of post-modernity:

  • Tolerance is necessary
    The news is saturated with war, terror, violence, destruction, natural disasters, and many other issues.  Rather, they would see love, even if taken too far, than fight over my values compared to your values. (Again, because my life affects me, but they have a different story)
  • Question everything
    Postmodernists are extremely skeptical of everything.  They have been lied to about so much.  “We will end war.” So much for that.  “We will be responsible businesses.” Can you say Enron or BP oil spills?  “Marriage vows of for better or for worse” followed up by 50% divorce rate. Why should they trust anything you say?
  • There is no ultimate truth
    If everyone has a unique story and different experiences, who is to say you know what truth is?  What is true for me is not necessarily true for you.  I believe that God will love and can protect me from the evils of this world.  Can a rape victim say the same thing?

Christian Worldview with Military Brats : Modernism Worldview

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1500’s – 1960’s

The Modernism worldview was a reaction to the Enlightenment era.  Science is king, facts are the structural support and foundational to the Modern Worldview is proving it.  We see this in our faith, with “The Four Gospel Laws” (defining salvation in a quick four points), “The Case for Christ” (validating the Bible), and a deep and rich doctrine and theology.

It is tough for modernist Christians to believe parts of the Bible still apply to today, including miracles, speaking in tongues, and demon possession, even though they are all present in the New Testament.  This is because there are no facts to explain it.  Thus, they question the details, that they may clearly define what they understand and approach everything rationally.  Look at modern science with DNA.  One hundred years ago, we would never have known this, but through rational speculation and research, we have come to understand much of DNA.  In many ways, this hurt the Church as much as it furthered the kingdom of God.

Another part of modernity is the idea of privilege.  With advances in medicine for longer and less painful life, air conditioning and vehicles, the Internet and television, and a “solution” for everything, we desire to be comfortable and too often become selfish. How many times a day do we feel like we NEED something, whether they are new shoes or the latest iPod APP?

Finally, as humanity has grown in this new advancement of knowledge, discovery, and ingenuity, they have gone from a mindset of religiosity to secularism.   Yes, the sun rises because God allows it, but many have come to accept that the sun rises only because of the laws of physics.  Thus, in a world explained by biology, psychology, physics, chemistry, mathematics, and language, why would we even need a God?



Christian Worldview with Military Brats : Defining A Worldview

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Last week, I told you that I would be putting together a series on Christian Worldview. This week we will feature that series in regards to Modernism and Postmodernism. I would love your feedback.

One day a little boy came to his father. “Today the teacher showed us a big round globe. She said was a model of the world. She said the world was just surrounded by space. How can that be? Dad, what holds up the world? Why doesn’t it just fall down?”
His father, knowing that this was just a child’s question, gave him a child’s answer: “It’s a camel holding up the world, son.”
The boy went away satisfied, for he trusted his father and for the moment it made sense. He’d seen pictures of camels holding up all sorts of things. So why not the world? But then he got to thinking about it and by the next day decided something was missing in his father’s answer. He asked, “Dad, I was just wondering: if a camel holds up the world, what holds up the camel?”
His father now thought that he might be in trouble. So, knowing that a quick answer turneth away further questions, he said, “It’s a kangaroo that holds up the camel.”
Again the boy went away, but this time only for a couple of hours. Back again with his father, he asked, “Dad, if a camel holds up the world and a kangaroo holds u the camel, what holds up the kangaroo?”
This time the father realized that he was in deep trouble. So he chose the largest animal he could thing of and he put a capital on it. That is, he shouted. People believe you if you shout, he thought. “It’s an Elephant holds up the kangaroo.”
“Come on, Dad!” his son retorted. “What holds up the Elephant?”
His father, in a fit of genius deriving from necessity, replied, “It’s…it’s…it’s Elephant all the way down.”
(Sire, 2004. p. 15-16)

A worldview is “the way that we view the world. We see everything through a specific lens: life, career, family, religion, etc.” Even more specifically, a Christian worldview “seeing everything with a Christian lens and a foundation in Scripture as well as a faith in our God.”

Links of the Week

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Kids who get recommended sleep least likely to be obese
A study of more than 300 children, ages 4-10, in a medical journal finds that as shut-eye drops, BMI goes up.

Chaplains try a new path to deal with PTSD
A Colorado theology school is teaching Air Force chaplains to consider the religious beliefs of servicemen and women to better help them cope with post-traumatic stress.

TEEN SUICIDE: What We Need to Know Pt. 1
TEEN SUICIDE: What We Need to Know Pt. 2
The first half of a four part series on what parents, youth pastors, and others need to know about what teens are going through and why teen suicide is such an issue right now.

It’s the Heart of the Matter by Bill Springston

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We have been entrusted with a sacred work. None of us created the story of how God so loved the world that he gave his only son. It is more like we were walking by a window and were drawn in by the sound of people we trusted telling their God story. We could have stayed by the window but the door was opened and the owner reached out and invited us in and we have become his story tellers.

I’m convinced it’s true. It has been in the telling of God’s story that my own life has become more real. I have come to realize that the most real people I know are like the gifts that will be given to children this Christmas that are continually aware of how much they are enjoyed by their owner.

My story is not always pretty. My story has both highs and lows. It involves stories of steps forward but also brokenness and hurts done to me and what I’ve done to others. Giving time and understanding to my story has helped me to see more of the work of His hand in my life. Our lives are not just a place where we get material for talks, they are a sacred work that we are invited to study and enjoy and give to others as a gift.
Here is a permission, friend. You will have just a little time this Christmas season, don’t waste it. During this time, take your life, all your life, and study and savor it. Tell or write down the last six months and see where God has been working. The heart of the matter is not that you have a story but that you offer your story back to the one who invited you into His story. If that is true then take the gift of your story seriously.

This year commit to remembering how the Christmas story became true to your story. Then go away and tell someone about your Christmas these last six months. May you be famous for telling your story with integrity of heart and skillful hands (Ps 78:72).

Bill Springston, Director of YFC Military for YFC/USA

(RP from Youth for Christ)

Links of the Week

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Military chaplains debate role without ”don”t ask”
As Congress debates the repeal of the Pentagon”s “don”t ask, don”t tell” policy, military chaplains are doing their own soul-searching.

Bush opens up on Billy Graham, prayer
The Graham story was a mainstay of Bush’s 2000 presidential campaign, when Bush strenuously courted evangelical leaders and voters. These days, Bush is dishing out details of his experience with Graham.

Deployed dad stays in kids” daily lives
Army Lt. Col. Noah Strong uses the internet from Kuwait to chat with family. They Skype every day, he manages finances and he and his son play chess