Working With A Teen In Crisis: Creating An Environment
So many crisis are never told to an adult because of the fear that they will be judged, ignored, or rejected because of the problem. Yet, we can create a safe environment for them to share their hearts with us instead of hiding it away by developing deep and authentic relationships that start with sharing your own hurts and wounds from your past, regularly telling students that adults in the church are hear to talk, and consistently preach and teach on the tough topics like suicide and bullying.
Developing Deep And Authentic Relationships
We cannot create a deep and authentic environment without a deep and authentic relationship. Authenticity attracts teens and builds trust, creating an environment for students to feel comfortable to share their hurts and feelings. We need to build those relationships and share our own heart so that they can relate to our lives and know that it is okay to share theirs. At the same time, they can smell a fake from a mile away. If we force it and show them we are not being real, we might destroy any chance to truly hear their heart.
Regularly Offer To Talk One-On-One
To many teens, we are just another group of people that have busy lives and while we seem to be dorky (in a cool way of course) and know all of the words to Never Say Never, the assumption that we do not have time to heart their story may still be there. We need to constantly remind them that we have purposely set aside time just to hear from them. Let them know that you want to hear their heart and are willing to take all the time it needs. But most importantly, they need to hear that no subject is too little or too scary to share, we are here for them.
Talk About The Tough Stuff
For those students that still think that their problems are too big, too scary, or too ugly to tell an adult about. They tried it once and got the evil look or turned away. But if we can go up into the pulpit and talk about cutting, abuse, premarital sex, and bullying. In that talk, share the sin of this fallen world and how God does not want you to drink or steal, but let them know of the hope that can come out of a tough break-up or disrespect of parents. Christ can and will redeem us all from whatever we have done.